Change [Elizabeth deSpain]

Elizabeth deSpain

I don’t want a different life,
Just a change in the atmosphere.
I don’t want a different look,
Just for no one to see when I shed a tear.
I don’t want a different background,
Maybe just explore some new ones.
I don’t want a change in the weather,
But it wouldn’t hurt to have more suns.
I’m sick and tired of the old things in life,
I want something worth living for.
I’m tired of broken hearts, disappointments,
Wasted talents and dreams, I need something more.
Something that gives me a promise, something to
Inspire my life into being all that it can be.
People look at me and don’t see who I really am.
I have to wear masks, fake smiles and hide the real me.
The sad part of it all, is that I’ve been hiding
For so long, that I don’t know the truth of it all.
Am I who I was way back when? Who
Is the real me? I think forever but can’t recall.
I’m a lost soul, an unread mind, another
Gust in the wind. It’s as if I’m not even here.
I don’t know who my real friends are, and to be
Left abandoned and alone is my greatest fear.
To wallow in sorrow and self pity, to cry over the
Same thing over and over, is the last thing I want to do.
But the words ‘you can’t’ and the negative scars
Buried deep within my heart are all I ever knew.